“We love because He first loved us.” – The Apostle John
Pursuing Our Children Like God Pursues Us
Recently, I was on a walk with my children when God laid on my heart that I need to pursue my children as He pursues me. We all have an innate need to be pursued by those who love us; our children are no exception to this need.
The beginning of the Bible through the end leads us through the ultimate story of His unfailing love, and we see that God our Father is THE pursuer of our souls.
God has designed us as parents to be the first and most important people to model this love relationship for our children.
Let’s look at how our Father so masterfully does this so we can model our parenting after Him!
1. He pursues us first. 1 John 4:19
We are able to love God because He loved us first. Be the initiator in your relationship! Start your day together by showing your children your love early in the morning. When they are distant, ask the Holy Spirit to show you their immediate needs. Touch is a great way to initiate: high fives, hugs, doing hair, and back rubs!
2. He pursues us with kindness. Jeremiah 31: 3
It is so lovely how the Lord draws us into relationship with Him by showing us unfailing kindness. Being kind to our child isn’t always easy, but it is the way to draw them near. You can use gentle words during heated moments, praise them, write love notes, or just smile!
3. He pursues us when we are lost. Luke 15:4-6
A child’s heart will wander from the safety of close relationship at times. In the Bible, Jesus models this by dropping everything and going after the lost one. When the time comes, we have to clear our schedules and intently focus on keeping our child from possible danger and winning them back for the Lord.
4. He pursued us to lay down His life. Matthew 20:25-26, 28
So much of our days consist of laying down our lives for our children. Ask God how you can serve your children. Help them with chores, make intentional alone time, invite a friend over, or serve a favorite meal or cup of tea!
5. He pursues us when we have a bad attitude like Moses, disobey Him like Jonah, mistreat Him like Paul, or even deny him like Peter.
This is the hard one for me! Sometimes we need a little break from our children before we pull up our sleeves to do the laborious work of loving them when they are difficult. Often, our children are unloving when they need us most. Spend time with God first, and then take your child out for some one-on-one time. This investment will fill your child’s cup and help them to be tenderer towards you. A little alone time makes a big difference!
6. His pursuit is ongoing and unending. Psalm 139:7-10
Our Father never stops going after us! Be encouraged my friend: you are on assignment from the Lord! May seeking their hearts be our life’s work. God will give you the energy you need for the long haul to continue seeking after your children.
One path to a close relationship with your children is to ask questions and to remain attentive when they talk to you. Listening intently to them is the key to cultivating an open relationship through their teenage years and into adulthood. Make sure to look your child in the eyes when they have something to say.
Father, we need your help to captures our children’s hearts – to lay down our lives so that they may feel your uncompromising love through us. Help us not only to seek our children out when it is easy but also when it is hard. May each of your children know that they are worth our pursuit.
-“We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19
-“The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” Jeremiah 31:3
-“:Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’” Luke 15:4-6
-“Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.'”Matthew 20:25-26, 28
-“Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.” Psalm 139:7-10
Make a pursuit plan! Ask the Lord where to begin with each child. How can you pursue each of them with touch, conversation, alone time, fun activity and gifts? Write it down and take the next few weeks or months to spend intentional time with each of your children. Let the Holy Spirit guide you and have fun!
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I have been married to my high school love, Andrew for 13 years. We have three loving and energetic children. God brought us to the beautiful mountains of Colorado from Las Vegas in 2012. We are on the greatest adventure of our lives as we follow Him in this unpredictable journey. I am passionate about home, family, friends, books, long walks, animals, and connect with God through nature. I love quiet afternoons with a cup of tea!