Having the Kind of Marriage God Intended

“Love and faithfulness meet together; righteousness and peace kiss each other.” Psalms 85:10

“There is no more lovely, friendly or charming relationship, communion or company, than a good marriage.” Martin Luther


  • Dear mama, quiet your heart before the Lord. Lay your marriage down at His feet and open your Bible. Please read Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. These verses are very encouraging for marriage.

Having the Kind of Marriage God Intended

I vividly remember a moment a few years ago when I knew that my marriage had been coasting for years. It hit me hard that we were raising four incredible children, we enjoyed each other’s company well enough, and we got along and hardly ever fought, but I could also crack down on my to-do list and not really notice my husband most days. I felt very defeated and restless. We weren’t encouraging one another and we weren’t challenging one another. Why wasn’t I fighting harder for my marriage?!

Friends, have you allowed your marriage to become like mine? When this mountain of realization crept up on me, I started reading the Scriptures and pledged myself to commitment again. I wanted a marriage that was not only mildly healthy, but I desired the marriage that God had intended when he created the amazing gift of matrimony. My husband and I both yearned for a deeper level of intimacy and connection, but God’s promises for us were harder to achieve than we realized. We were in the trenches of parenthood and life was full of busyness and stress. Our marriage had slipped tremendously, and we had allowed it to happen.

Over the next few months, my husband and I embraced the promise that God didn’t just create marriage to be a pleasant relationship that produces children. He created the union of marriage to forge two sinners together to sharpen, love, support, respect, and challenge the other, for a lifetime. This love is a serious commitment and takes great faith! We knew and now know with all certainty that God puts everything back together the way He always intends for it to be. He longs to restore harmony, love, faithfulness, righteousness, and peace into every marriage that was formed in Him. “With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:2-3 ESV).

Blessings and Love,


Questions to Ponder

  • What are some areas of your marriage where both you and your husband can improve and make a better effort? There is no way restoration can happen without each person admitting their weaknesses. And no defensive behavior is allowed!

Faith-Filled Ideas

The path to a stronger and more intimate marriage involved lots of minor steps and adjustments for us. We started small and here were a few of our changes:

  1. We committed to spending 20-30 minutes together nightly to talk and connect. No TV allowed! And no talking about logistics and schedule. We simply shared our hearts.
  2. We each thought of one way where we could completely serve the other. We didn’t do it to receive anything back. We simply loved and cared for one another in a tangible way. P.S. I made time to help organize and clean out my husband’s home office!
Rachel Jones
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2 Comments on “Having the Kind of Marriage God Intended”

  1. I feel so distant from my husband. Living a completely functional marriage with no love or respect

    1. Thank you for your comment. I completely understand the season you are in. Please know that God can turn anything around and He desires for every marriage to be filled with love, intimacy, and trust!!! I suggest starting to pray daily for your marriage and specifically for your husband. This daily habit will change your outlook and the way you see your husband. Do something nice and intentional, even if it is small, for your husband every day. He might not notice right away, but over a few weeks, I know it will make a difference. Planting these seeds can truly blossom your marriage into something new and miraculous. I will also be praying for you Janice! 🙂

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