Lavish Grace on Your Man: Companion Guide

This simple poem about God’s grace is beautiful! Read it slowly and let it penetrate through to your heart, mama.

Grace To the Rescue by Deborah Ann Belka

Grace restores,
the broken pieces
fills in the cracks
smooths the creases.
Grace heals,
the heart that aches
mends the wounds
patches the scrapes.

Grace renews,
the mind unraveled
reinforces the thoughts
that have been tangled.
Grace reaffirms,
the soul wanting
provides the strength
brings the calming.
Grace restores,
heals and renews
Grace always comes
to our rescue!

Jesus was on to something when He first lavished grace on us when we believed in Him. The Bible tells us in 1 Timothy 1:14, “The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly…” He first gave us the gift of grace through eternal life—a gift we don’t deserve, yet get to fully experience in heaven. He also gave us the gift of daily graces we get to experience now. His compassion, tender mercy, and love toward us as imperfect humans cover our flaws and sins. I love how the Bible talks about God’s mercy too. Mercy can be a “church-y” kind of word, but its meaning is beautiful: a love that responds to human need in an unmerited or unexpected way. As I think about Jesus, I realize that He is the example for me in my marriage. His unending kindness towards me, in the form of grace, gently convicts and encourages me to extend the same thing in my marriage and to my children.

Can we be real for a second? Grace is hard…especially in marriage! For most of us, giving an answer that is intertwined with grace to someone when we’re irritated or frustrated does not come easily. Quite the opposite! Being defensive, snappy, or putting on our “Captain Know-It-All” hat usually comes first! We can also be very self-focused, noticing more about how our husbands’ behavior or bad habits affect our lives. I bet if we gave ourselves one tiny minute, we could write down a good list of things that bother us about our husbands. That saddens me to think of, but it also humbles me! Because I bet he could make a list of his own about me! God is not concerned about these little lists, however. But I can tell you what He is concerned about: grace—and dumping it on our men by the bucket-full!

I love this quote by Lysa Terkeurst: “It’s easier to give grace when I remember how much I need grace.” Can I get an “Amen?!” Sister, we all need grace by the bucket-full! A vow that I would add to the traditional line-up would be, “I vow to give you the gift of grace, even when you don’t deserve it and haven’t asked for it.” Years and years into marriage, I see how this single act in our marriage could change it! Hearts would be softened, apologies and forgiveness would flow off the tongue more easily, wounds would be healed, and our words would be sweeter. Grace is such an incredible gift that we have at our disposal! And oh how our husband needs it, even though he may never ask for it! I love this verse from Ecclesiastes 10:12, “Words from the mouth of the wise are gracious, but fools are consumed by their own lips.” Do you want to be wise? I know I do.

If Jesus has bestowed this grace on me, who am I to withhold it? And especially from the man that I vowed myself to forever. God doesn’t demand. He doesn’t insist. He doesn’t anger easily. He isn’t proud and defensive. He is just. He is loving. He is kind. He guides us with a gentle hand that urges our hearts toward good. He is for our marriages, and He is so very pleased when we love our men with a pure heart, intending good for them, just as He does.

With Love,

Krystle P.

Pray with Me:

“Jesus, thank You for Your grace. We need Your grace so badly each day, and we are so grateful that each new morning, You fill our buckets and give it to us willingly! We pray that as we look at our husbands, we see them as someone who needs this type of love too. Open our eyes to see how we can do this in our specific relationships. Show us Your ways for our marriages. Help us to lean on the example of Your grace toward us with our words, actions, and attitudes in our homes. Help us to see the good in our husbands and to interact with them in ways that please You and honor our marriage. And please help us to remember the blessings You have for us when we live in this way. Let us love our spouses with tender, kind, and compassionate love. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.”

Have a Talk with God:

I adore the song by JJ Heller “If you Fall.” I encourage you to Google it, listen to it, and think and pray for your husband as you do! It is a sweet reminder of how we are to be “with” our husbands. It sings of a great love that stands together no matter what. Ask God to show you in the coming days how you can stand more with your husband and what that could look like for your relationship. Praying for you, sister!

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