“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.” 1 John 3:1 NIV

Let me set a scene for you from my house a few nights ago. My teenager was perusing YouTube for fashion experts to influence his sense of style. He’s trying to find “his look” and is seeking a sense of identity with his friends in high school. My husband and I were tucking in our toddler. We follow the same routine every night. On this particular night, however, our darling two-year-old was defiantly shaking his head and cackling, “No, no, no!” He would absolutely not tell his daddy goodnight. My husband looked at me and said, “I don’t even know what to do.” I just shrugged and said, “That’s how I feel for most of the day!”

Mamas, am I the only one who feels like I have more questions than answers when it comes to knowing how to love my children well? I wonder how to guide, support, discipline, and still show them unconditional love. We all know it’s not a one size fits all. They each have unique needs, and as soon as you get the swing of things in one stage, you enter another! 

God has been bringing me back around His truth about His love and loving my children. Love is not complicated in God’s presence. It’s encompassing, forgiving, understanding and makes a way when there is not a way. 

Mama, you and I are children of God. Our needs, desires and struggles change dramatically in every season, just like our children’s. How many times have I looked at the world around me to decide on how I want to look, speak or be known? How many times have I defiantly said, “No!” to my gentle Father’s love because I wanted something I thought was better? When I look back on my life now, I can see how my Heavenly Father walked, waited, wept, and hoped with me through every season. He was always available in the big and small. He was never afraid of how I would turn out. He had already decided I was worth dying for, no matter what choices I made. 

Dear friend, your greatest help in understanding how to love your children comes from the Helper himself. God’s Holy Spirit is alive and active in you if you have received Jesus as your Savior. He is a Wonderful Counselor and a Comforter. He never leaves you nor forsakes you, and He walks with you through every season. Your fear, shame and insecurities will fall away as you lean in to His love for you. You become more fully yourself, which creates space for your children to do the same.

Mamas who walk in the knowledge that they are fully loved and fully known are equipped to raise children the same way. Your love for your children flows directly out of your understanding of Your Father’s love for you! Sister, He gives that revelation of love very freely – just ask for it! 

Love,

Kacy and the Help Club for Moms Team

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Kacy Ladd

Hi! I’m Kacy. I am so grateful to have the most unexpected family. I left my job as a marriage and family therapist in Texas for a “6-month mission trip” to South Africa in 2010 and stayed when I met a little boy who needed a mama. That little boy is now a teenager who towers over me, and I still love hearing him call me “Mom”.

Five years into single parenting in the African bush, a Tennessee man also entered the mission field. We met and decided to stay in South Africa and get married.

We are now living in Cape Town, South Africa building up the local church with our teenager and toddler boys.

Help Club for Moms became a lifeline to me when I was lonely on the mission field with a new baby in a foreign country. I am so thankful to write for this community and to document God’s work in my own family at http://www.ladd.family

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