What Really Defines You?

identity in Christ day 6

We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise. 2 Corinthians 10:12

“We aren’t called to be like other Christians; we are called to be like Christ.”- Stacy L. Sanchez


  • Oh, how He loves us! Go to a quiet place and be with your Savior today. Read his Word and meditate on His scriptures. Pray and ask Jesus that you will find your identity in Him and not in other people’s opinions. What the world thinks does not matter!!!
  • Read 2 Corinthians 5:16-21, and 2 Corinthians 10:12. Write the beautiful encouragement found in the second half of verse 12 in your journal, “When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.”
  • Pray and ask God to show you any areas where you may be comparing yourself, your marriage, children or circumstances to others. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you how to see yourself the way He sees you, and to move forward in the life He has for you.

What Really Defines You?

Have you ever been sitting with a group of moms as they discuss new dishes to cook while you are wondering what frozen meal to make tonight?

Have you had your child say something rude, and then become so embarrassed because another mom heard and judged your parenting?

Does it seem to you that all your mom friends on Facebook have a happier family than you?

Do you feel like your children would be better off with someone else as their mom?

Do any of the above statements really matter? Is this what really defines us?

I am here to tell you that not a single one of these scenarios has anything to do with your true identity, which is your identity in Christ.

What is identity?

Oxford dictionary defines identity as, “the fact of being who or what a person or thing is.”

In this simple definition, you see that your identity is not about what you do.

Your actions, outward appearance, or strengths & weaknesses are not your identity.

As a Christ-Follower, there is only one way to identify yourself, and that is who Jesus declared you to be.

In 2 Corinthians 5:21, Paul tells us that because Jesus became sin for us, we are righteous. Our identity is righteousness. Peter later says in 1 Peter 2:9, “but we are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of the darkness and into His wonderful light.”

Isn’t that amazing? We are righteous, chosen, royal, holy, and we belong to God! Wow! If we truly understood who we are in Christ, and all we have because of Him, we would find it easier to simply be ourselves, knowing that God dwells in us and gives us everything we need to live the individual life to which He has called us.

God tells us in 2 Corinthians 10:12 that we are to be who God created us to be, and not compare ourselves to anyone else.

So how can we as moms change our thinking? I know in my life this has been difficult. I am constantly comparing myself to other moms and wondering if I am doing enough. However, my mother gave me some great advice a long time ago.

She said, “There will always be someone ahead of you and someone behind you.”

This opened my eyes to stop focusing on others and start focusing on myself and how God sees me. When we spend time looking at others and worrying or comparing, that blocks out God and how He sees us!

I realize this is easier said than done. I realize this is going to take us praying to our Father and crying out to Him. But dear friends, it is so worth it! Colossians 1:10 says, “and we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord [read: not others] and may please Him in every way.”

The Lord is pleased with you! I pray that you feel this deep in your spirit today and that you live in freedom and peace knowing you are righteous and holy.

Questions to Ponder

  • Do you like yourself? Pray about this and write in your journal five things you love about yourself.
  • Why do we care what other people think? Is it to appear better than them? To get attention? For validation? I challenge you to think and pray about this.

Faith Filled Idea

  • Go outside and find a smooth, flat rock. Paint it one solid color that makes you happy. Let it dry and then grab a dry erase marker. Using the marker, write words or phrases reflecting how God sees you. You can simply copy the ones I listed in the study if you’d like. Once dry, set this rock on your dresser or kitchen counter to remind you of the way God sees you and has guided your life until now. You are His and not the world’s. This is called your Ebenezer stone. Samuel uses it in 1 Samuel 7:12 to show how the Lord had helped him.
  • Don’t forget to do your Mom Tips! These ideas really will help you to be more organized in your home!


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– What could we accomplish if we could see ourselves the way God sees us?


Daphne Close and Rachel Jones
Latest posts by Daphne Close and Rachel Jones (see all)

14 Comments on “What Really Defines You?”

  1. This is a great question asking what we can accomplish if we see ourselves the way God sees us. I totally feel that when we put comparisons aside and focus on our unique strengths the level of accomplishment is multiplied and taken to a level only God can take you, further than we could even imagine!

    A good analogy I have in my mind would be a well-oiled machine operating at optimal performance–each piece of the machine operates together to make a grand piece-of-work. If even one tiny cog is out of place or doing something else it wasn’t intended for the big grand outcome would not happen!

    I learned a long time ago to embrace who I was and not focus on others as my measuring stick…it was one of the best lessons I could have learned. God has made us each uniquely and that alone is such a miracle worth living out!

    1. Thanks Kristall! That is a great analogy. God has a plan and we need to get out of His way with our comparisons and insecurities! 🙂

    1. I am praying for you Tammy. Please message me if there is anything specific I can pray for you. I am so sorry and I know that the Lord is with you. He never leaves us. Ever!

    2. Thank you for reading this Bible study and for sharing today. I am also praying for you. Praying that God reveals to you how wonderful and amazing you ARE! Also, that you will gain encouragement from the gifts and talents He has uniquely given you.

  2. I’ve struggled with the same thing, not comparing myself with others, but being too aware of how the world sees me. God showed me that it was making it difficult to point others to Him. If I just see myself through His eyes, people will see the peace He brings and be drawn to that.

    1. Yes Heather!!! We cannot point others to Him if we are focused too much on the world. This is always a struggle for me as well and that is why I knew I needed to write on it. Praying for you today my love!!

  3. This is something I use to struggle with intensely, especially because I did things different than most is my family. But, in that, we have broken negative family patterns. I used to be very self conscious about who I was for constantly being put down as a child but now I know that is from the enemy and there is so much peace in that. Now, I can appreciate the gifts and uniquenesses God gave me, and appreciate those things in others which I can’t do. I love learning from other moms who have strengths in other areas I don’t have and encouraging moms in areas that are my strengths.

    1. Thanks for sharing Brandi! I love what you wrote about learning from moms with gifts you do not have. Also, in turn, encouraging moms in areas that you are strong in. This is key in my opinion. We should all be embracing these behaviors instead of comparing and feeling bad about ourselves! 🙂

  4. Great job Rachel and Daphne! I am so thankful for this timely message! Even at my age I am tempted to compare. It’s is unwise! God is enough for each of us at every stage in our lives. He wants us to come to him and trust him with our circumstances. I am so grateful for our Fathers love!

  5. Amen! I love this! Thanks for covering the comparison factor and trying to pleasing other Moms…I love what you said: It doesn’t matter. When I compare myself with other Moms, I feel so condemned and end up being side-swiped and not doing what God has called me to do! I know that’s not from God. If we were all meant to be alike, God would have made us that way! We are full of joy when we love ourselves the way God made us. Thanks for this Devo!

    1. Yep! This topic has always been so important to me. We are all different and we should encourage and praise those differences instead of allowing them to cause bitterness and jealousy. Love you! 🙂

  6. This is so very encouraging to me. I struggle with comparing myself too, and I know it is the enemy who always suceeds in making us appear to come up short. Thank you for encouraging me to look to Christ for my identity and value. His opinion is the only one that truly matters! It gives me so much peace to know that He sees me as His precious daughter, holy and dearly loved.

    1. It is the enemy. He loves our insecurities and allows them to often eat us up. I think as more woman see this struggle for what it is we can all commit together to appreciate how we are different. Love you! 🙂

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