The Trap of Comparison
“For God judges everyone by the same standard.” Romans 2:11 GNT
Can I be honest with you? For many, many years I have fallen into the trap of comparison; never feeling like I was good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, and always feeling like I didn’t measure up.
This was true for me as a woman, and it was true for me as a mother.
The problem with the measuring stick is that it can get you stuck; stuck in a quicksand of lies that ultimately cause you to sink deeper and deeper into the enemy’s trap.
Moses Felt Unqualified Because of Comparison
Hang out with me for a little while in Exodus chapter four, beside the burning bush, next to Moses, as God has ordained him to lead God’s people out of Egypt. Exodus 4:1-16
Here, where Moses hid from the glory of God in the cleft of the rock, we also find someone who wanted to hide from God’s calling.
Upon the heights of Mount Sinai, you will not find a confident man who was ready for the enormity of the task and the purpose God had for his life. What you will find is a man who was fearful and insecure. He argued with God and begged Him to send someone else. He felt unqualified, not good enough; unable to fulfill what God had created him for.
In Moses, I thought I had found a kindred spirit.
But God did not say, “Well okay I’ll find someone else,” No! God said, “Now GO and I will help you and teach you what to do.” Exodus 4: 12-15.
Why was Moses so certain he was unfit? I believe it was because he was comparing himself to others. I know many of us fall into this trap of the devil as well.
It is one of the enemy’s favorite tools in his evil toolbox—to keep people from their God-given purpose by creating doubt that is punctuated by comparison.
The Social Media Trap of Comparison
In our culture today, and especially in the social media world, I believe it is so important to hold tight to what David proclaimed in Psalm 139, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful; I know that full well.” Psalm 139: 13-14.
David wasn’t praising God for the light of the full moon, the grandeur of the mountains, the hovering of the hummingbird, or the strength of the sea. He was talking about the masterpiece of David.
We, too, are God’s masterpieces.
I know you look at Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest, and then you look at yourself, your house, and your kids and you feel like you are not as good of a mom as “those” moms. Many try and duplicate what they see, and they rarely succeed.
You know why? You were never meant to. God didn’t create two people alike for a reason. He has created you uniquely and specifically with the personality, gifts, talents, and abilities to do exactly what He needs YOU to do.
Trust me when I say this: You are enough! You are a good mom!
Your Identity Needs No Comparison
The same God who flung the stars into the sky and dapples the wildflowers with morning dew, looked at His creation and decided that He needed one of you.
Your identity is not found in others, but it is defined by your Heavenly Father. You are who He says you are.
Comparing yourself to others will inevitably result in a diminishing of the call and purpose of your life. I know first-hand how detrimental this can be on your self-esteem and your joy.
Mom, you were meant to be you, not someone else. Jeremiah says, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, and before you were born, I consecrated you.” Jeremiah 1:5
As moms, we need to be building each other up, love each other for who we are and not who we aren’t, and to pray for each other.
Don’t be envious of the snapshot you see on social media. It is never the whole story, it’s just the highlight reel.
And don’t let the enemy allow comparison to prevent you from enjoying motherhood. He prowls around seeking whom he can devour. 1 Peter 5:8 Never allow the devil to have that much control over you; don’t let him steal your joy.
Simply be who God created you to be and know that it is enough!
Be blessed, unique, wonderful, one-of-of-kind mom,
Susie O’Neal and the Help Club for Mom’s Team