A Letter to My Teens about Dating

See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the people, but the LORD rises upon you and his glory appears over you. Isaiah 60:2

Dear Children,

In a world where family, marriage, and genders are on trial, you need to know that our future generations are at stake.
If Hollywood is setting the standard, you can be assured that the current movies and musicians are ruling your dad and me outdated and your grandparents old-fashioned and boring. Who is your role model? Is it the artist of that new release? Or is it the generation of honor and respect, that kept your grandparents in love for 40 years?

Yes, Ol’ fashioned is unpopular, but you know what? Sometimes it’s ok to rebel against popular.

Here’s to a good start:


  1. If you fall in love with a girl’s face, your love will fade with her beauty.
  2. If you fall in love with her soul, your love will grow deeper with age.
  3. She needs to know you have eyes for her alone and that she is more valuable to you than any other!
  4. The right one will bring out your best. She will nurture your talents, encourage your exploits and talk good common sense when you need it most!


  1. You should know that a man’s heart is more tender and loyal than you might think.
  2. Treat him like a king and he will give you the kingdom! He wants to spoil you; carry your bags, open doors, and pick up the tab. Let him. This is a good sign that he will help you with dirty dishes and a messy house if you marry him. He will want to take risks and be brave. Support him, because you trust him!
  3. Don’t play with his heart by cuddling, kissing and crying to get your way. This breaks trust and creates disrespect.
  4. The right man for you will bring out your best! He will lead you spiritually, allow you to pursue your dreams, and hear your heart. Hang on to him.


  1. Passion is good and of God, don’t bury it. Instead, cultivate it and direct it in righteousness.
  2. Physical attraction to the opposite sex is absolutely normal, natural and good! Don’t feel guilt or condemnation for a healthy appreciation of beauty or strength. God is an amazing artist and knows how to give good gifts! However, if you feed your natural tendencies with porn or uncontrolled thoughts of lust, this is where you derail. The wreckage will cost you more than you want to pay. It’s NOT worth it!
  3. You should not expect sex from your dating partner nor should you even think to ask for it!
  4. You have what it takes to turn the tide! You can bring back chivalry and honor and enjoy a long, satisfying and adventurous life!

Love, Your forever Mom

Go Deeper: So many times we parent out of fears or past regrets. Release these mistakes to God and trust him to do immeasurably more than all you ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within you and your children. (Paraphrased Ephesians 3:20)

What’s next: Write a letter to your teenagers and lay it on their bed, sealed with a kiss. (If you like this letter, write it out in your own handwriting and sign your name)

If you are looking for more resources on dating in today’s world, I highly recommend the book; Courtship In Crisis by Tomas Umstattd Jr.

I’m praying for you!


Kara Schrock and the Help Club for Moms Team

summer 11

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Kara Schrock
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5 Comments on “A Letter to My Teens about Dating”

  1. Cuts to the chase – Excellent advice with a biblical & godly perspective, perfect for our teens Kara! Priceless! ??

  2. My kids are still young, but I appreciate you sharing on this topic and providing ways to guide our children through that complex time in a godly way!

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