Mama, It’s Not Your Job to Make Your Husband Good

“A loving doe, a graceful deer…” Proverbs 5:19a

“It’s my job to love and respect Billy; it’s God’s job to make him good. God called you not to make your husband good, but to make him happy.”-Ruth Bell Graham.

I love reading anything by Ruth Bell Graham, the Reverend Billy Graham’s wife. Over the years, her writings have inspired me, convicted me, and caused me to want to love my husband and children well. I appreciate learning from older and wiser women like Ruth, who can drive a point home sweetly but with the touch of a velvet hammer. Her words cause you to stop dead in your tracks, but always give you hope in the exhortation.

I remember reading today’s quote from Ruth as a young wife, feeling the admonishment to stop the process of nagging my husband about his faults and instead make the decision in my heart to make him happy. How often do we wives fix our gaze on all of the habits and quirks of our men, instead of praying earnestly for them to feel the love of Jesus and asking the Lord to help us be a respectful, encouraging wife who loves to make her husband happy?

How much more joyful would our little homes be if they were filled with the unconditional love of Jesus, and if our aim was to build up our men instead of tearing them down? There is still a need to be honest with our husbands when a situation arises, but when we can give up our expectations and control to the Lord, we can minister to our husbands and be a source of encouragement instead of criticism. We can then truly be like the “loving doe” and “graceful deer” whose husband is intoxicated with her love (Proverbs 5:19).

As we pray and ask God to teach us how to love and respect our husbands well, may we ask Him to open our hearts, give us wisdom, and help us to make our husbands’ lives a bit happier, even if it’s just in some little way? After all, Rome wasn’t built in a day, and a good marriage can become great as we choose to love well one day at a time.

Blessings and love,
Deb Weakly and the Help Club for Moms Team


Deb Weakly

2 Comments on “Mama, It’s Not Your Job to Make Your Husband Good”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Time limit is exhausted. Please reload the CAPTCHA.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.