Bonus Mom, You are Known and Seen

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.” Psalm 28:7

I remember years ago I was attending my first women’s group with The Help Club for Moms. I was full of anxiety and just did not know what to expect. I came to the group because I had been following along in the current book and it was really speaking to me and helping me through a rough time in my life. It was early in my marriage and, if you’re a stepmom or a “bonus mom” of any type, you know that these conversations can be difficult when trying to explain your situation to others without feeling judged or having some type of unwelcome comments thrown into the conversation.

Well, I began speaking with one of these women and felt myself brace for her response when I explained that I had both a biological daughter and a stepdaughter. Instead of the typical responses I usually receive, she stopped and looked me in the eye and said, “Oh wow, you’re a stepmom? How is that for you? That must be incredibly difficult at times.” That was all it took for me to relax, and we proceeded to have a really great conversation. I felt at home in a room full of women I had never met before.

Being a stepmom, it is rare to find support from others who are not in the role themselves, because they truly do not get it. If you are a bonus mom reading this, just know that you are seen, and we get the struggles that come along with your role. And more importantly, God loves you and sees all you do for your bonus kids. It’s okay to not have it all together; God does not expect you to be perfect. Blended families can be messy and complicated, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t full of blessings.

God placed you in your children’s lives for a reason and entrusted you with their care. Continue to lean into Him and He will help you. These children are SO blessed to have you in their lives, leading them towards Christ.

Blessings and Love,


Danielle Novotny
Latest posts by Danielle Novotny (see all)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Time limit is exhausted. Please reload the CAPTCHA.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.