We Know Each Other So Well
The other day, my husband and I were taking an evening walk around the neighborhood. We love this time together. It is a chance for us to catch up on how each other’s days were, what happened at work, plans we have for the house, plans we have for the future; sometimes we don’t say much at all, but just enjoy holding hands and being in each other’s company.
As we were talking, the sun setting behind us and the evening breeze blowing strongly, we said the exact same thing at the same time. This is something we find ourselves doing often. I suppose you cannot be with someone for 26 years and not start to think the same, or even speak the same. We laughed and joked that we had been together too long. But it is in knowing him so well that I am able to pray for him so well.
Lest you think that this sounds like a perfect marriage, I assure you that it is not. My husband and I have been through some wonderful times, but we have also gone through our share of hardships and difficulties as well. But through it all, I have learned to pray for him, and to pray for him consistently on a daily basis. When I began to do this, I began to see changes in him and in our marriage.
One of the things that I know many Christian women are going through is the struggle of living with a man who is not a believer. If that is you today, or if you have friends or family members who are dealing with this issue, I want to give you some difficult but necessary steps to creating a firmer foundation for your marriage and to hopefully bring your husband into a relationship with Jesus Christ.
You must become a prayer warrior for your husband.
What You Can Know
If your husband is not a believer, or his faith walk and yours are on different paths, know that God is seeking his heart. God is always wooing and pursuing his children. God longs to draw your husband to himself.
Do not be deceived by the enemy that your husband is a lost cause. Don’t believe the lie that he will never change. Those words are meant to create frustration and separation. The devil wants you to lose faith and to lose hope. He wears you down so that you begin to wonder if your prayers are being heard—they are! Don’t fall into the trap of lies that he is setting for you.
Keep praying for your husband’s salvation. Keep praying that he would soften his heart to seek the heart of the Father. Remember that Jesus said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26.
Your husband needs you to keep praying for him, even if he doesn’t realize it yet.
God Wants the Best for Your Marriage
God created both of you. There is no one who knows you like the Father knows you and he wants the best for both of you as individuals and as husband and wife. When you come to him in prayer, the Lord will reveal powerful truths about his plans for you and for the man you love.
Jesus said this about your marriage, “So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together let no one separate.” Matthew 19:6.
We are called to pound on heaven’s door!
God has ordained that you and your husband are one flesh, and so it is important to fight the battle, to be the prayer warrior, to not surrender to the enemy.
Is your husband worth fighting for? Is your marriage worth fighting for?
God believes it is so don’t stop praying!
Three Ways You Can Approach Praying for Your Husband
I know that some of you are dealing with some very difficult situations in your marriage and with your husbands. I know that you may even find the idea of praying for him very difficult as well. There have been times in my own marriage where I found it difficult to pray for my husband. There were times when we went through some hard seasons and the last thing I wanted to do was pray for him.
But I knew that things were never going to change if I didn’t pray. Often, I believe that walking in the obedience to pray regularly helped not only soften my husband’s heart, but it helped soften mine as well. I honestly don’t know how people make it without prayer.
Praying for your husband should be something that you do everyday. God has called us to pray without ceasing. This is especially important when you are praying for your marriage, your husband, and for his salvation. Do not grow weary in praying for him, even if you don’t see the fruit of your planting—keep planting that seed of faith.
“You do not have because you do not ask.” James 4:2 ESV.
When you come to the Lord in your daily prayer for your husband, know that God is there waiting for you. He already knows what you need and he is ready to listen to you. But he wants to hear from you and he wants you to be specific about what you are asking for.
If you are praying for your husband’s salvation or to increase his faith, then ask the Lord for that specifically. If your husband has other needs then pray for those as well.
I know that it is not easy to be thankful in many of the circumstances that you face in your marriage. But there is something so powerful about giving thanks to God even in the midst of trials and difficulties.
It defeats the forces of darkness in the spiritual realm. When we thank God for everything he has given us, even when he gives us things that are hard, it stops the devil in his tracks and causes him to run away from us defeated.
I hope that you are encouraged by this call to action to be a prayer warrior for your husband. My prayer for you is that you would find the strength to keep pressing in and keep waiting for the miracle.
I know that praying for an unbelieving husband can feel like the Jericho wall. God told the Israelites to walk around that wall in prayer for seven days and the wall would fall. If they had given up on the sixth day, they would have missed the miracle—don’t give up! Keep walking around that wall and pray that the walls of your husband’s heart would fall.
I have a friend who had the divorce papers signed. Her husband had walked away from God and the church and he had walked away from her into a relationship with another woman. Just days before it was to go to court to make it official, her husband called her and told her that he had rededicated his life to Christ and that he didn’t want to get a divorce. He wanted to try and fix what he had broken; what the devil had broken in their relationship.
Today, after time and much counseling from their pastor, they are happier than they have ever been, and they are enjoying life with a new baby girl. I can tell you from walking with her during that season that she NEVER stopped praying for him. She didn’t give up before the seventh day and she got the miracle she had been crying out for.
The impossible became possible through Jesus.
So don’t let the enemy defeat you in this most important battle—be a warrior and don’t give up before you see the miracle!
Susie O’Neal and the Help Club for Moms Team
If you want to know more about me or my ministry, Between the Gardens, visit my website at susieoneal.org